For all the mamas, soon to be mamas and want to be mamas. This is some sage advice I want to pass to you.
To give some background if you’re new here or don’t know much about me… I have two beautiful, spirited, clever little girls. Bo is 7 and Harper is 3. My ex husband lives most of his time in the USA, starting his empire and so that means the girls are with me full time, most of the time.
I am also a working mama. On top of the mentoring and coaching I do within the Gratitude Gang, I also am constantly creating new content and finding talent to educate our members of the Health Hub. Throw in weekly interviews for various podcasts, the occasional photo shoot for brands and content creation - work is busy.
And then, attentive girlfriend to my man and half time help when his two girls are with us half of the week. All the cooking, cleaning, homework, playing and other jobs that come with being a mum.
My hands are full and so is my heart. Life is good!
But one thing I’ve struggled with since the transition from being a single mum of 2 and only having my girls 50% of the time when my ex husband lived here, to now having them 100% of the time, is the balance of spending enough time in all the areas.
My kids need me.
My business needs me.
My partner wants me.
Seeing my parents and friends are important to me.
The kitchen needs me.
The laundry needs me.
Having me time is important to me.
So I started to feel challenged around the juggle. I was used to 3 days where I would work, socialise, get the house ready and nail life. Then 3-4 days of mum life and the work juggle.
And one thing that always pulled at my heart-strings was my kids wanting my attention, always just when I sat at my computer, or pulled out my phone to do some work.
EVERY - DAMN - TIME.
Anyone else experience this?
So I enrolled in an online parenting course that I had heard about MULTIPLE times and decided to actually do it. I had heard Amy on a podcast and knew she aligned with my desired method of parenting.
And one of the first things she will teach you, is one of the most valuable.
MIND, BODY AND SOUL TIME.
Essentially, it’s mini ‘mummy dates’ with each child. Ten minutes every single day, same time of day, one child at a time. This is 10 minutes of time to do WHATEVER they want to do. Play dolls, make something in the kitchen, have a chat, go for a bike ride.
And let me get this straight, it’s not the only time you will spend with your kids that day - obviously.
But it is scheduled, important and focused time with each child. No phone around. No place to be.
Just you, and your child. Connecting. How they want.
Now listen, with all the stuff going on with lock down, it was pretty simple. We were home all the time each day. But now that school is back and routine is happening again, this is something that needs to be a priority.
The magic is, that each time you do this, you show your child that they’re important and special. They belong and they’re significant. And at the end of ten minutes when the timer may go off you can say “same time tomorrow?” and they don’t BEG for more minutes because they know that everyday, you have special time with them. Just them. Doing just what they want.
Our children want to know they are significant to us and that they belong. I’ve found that this time fills up their love cup and gives us the connection that sometimes we go a few days without feeling, especially when there is so much going on at home.
It’s been a game changer.
You can learn more about Positive Parenting Solutions by clicking HERE.
And I’d love to know below - what is the BEST parenting advice you have ever received?